"A man travels the world in search of what he needs and returns home to find it."
~George Moore

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Choices and Omissions

The choices that you make in life directly affect you and shape your path. It is impossible to decide to do one things without deciding not to do another. This being true there are always things that you give up with the decisions that you make.

It is often hard not to think about how things would be if you chose the other path. Not necessarily out of regret but out of curiosity.

One of the first decisions that stands out in my mind as something that shaped my path, is deciding not to continue playing volleyball.

It was an influential part of my adolescence, but ultimately I decided by committing to volleyball I was losing out on a lot more. It often kept me from participating in sleepovers and other important parts of my childhood. So I cannot say that I regret not pursuing volleyball because I wanted to keep my childhood for a little bit longer.

Another important decision in my life was that of choosing a high school. There were many that I was considering. It ultimately came down to two main high schools. One of which my grandmother attended and the other that my best friend was to attend. I was leaning toward the one that my grandmother attend up until the last minute. I chose the one my best friend was going to. We are still best friends today and I can't imagine my high school experience without her. Waiting until the last minute also meant a lot as well. About a year before high school, my grandmother passed. She was proud that I was going to her alma mater and I know she would have secretly been disappointed by this decision and it would have upset her. It's comforting to know that I had the freedom to make the decision without worrying about upsetting someone I loved so much.

This same tough choice came once again for colleges. There were also many options but I narrowed it down to three. One of which I decided they were pretentious and they rubbed me the wrong way on the visit. So the decision coming down to two once again. There was the university in my hometown and the university an hour away I always wanted to attend and follow in my brothers footsteps. Many things were taken into consideration. My decision was not made for the best of reasons. I decided to stay in my hometown because of pressure from my parents, mainly my mother. She convinced me that it would be more financially smart, which it is. I am not sure that financial security in college was worth missing out on the away college experience.
I have accepted this decision. There are many things in Louisville that I would not give up now.

Within the University decision there was also the major decision. I began college thinking I was going to become an Engineer. At the University of Louisville, there is an excellent Engineering program. In five years you graduate with a Masters in Engineering. After your first two years, you spend every other semester doing co-op and every other semester taking classes for the remaining three years. During the co-op you are paid well and many expenses are covered. Often the place that you co-op with offers you a job right out of school. There is also a high demand for female Engineers. All of these things sounded extremely attractive. Ultimately I decided that this is not the path that would make me happy. I know that I could have done it and I would have been extremely successful, but it is not where my passion lies.

All of these decisions among many others directly lead me to where I am today. Sometimes it is hard not to think about how things could have been different. but in the words of Tim McGraw, "Well you do what you do and you pay for your sins
And there's no such thing as what might have been
That's a waste of time
Drive you out of your mind"

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